M is for “Ma”, the term of endearment for my abuelita.

O is for my son, the “Object” of my affection.

T is for the “Tears” being a mother brings.

H is for “Heart”, for mine now lives outside of me.

E is for “Everything” I have sacrificed to be your mom.

R is for “Resilient”, grit ONLY made possible by motherhood.

Last week we celebrated mothers. I am Hispanic and celebrate both Mother’s Day and Día de Las Madres, which is celebrated in Mexico on May 10th. The treat-yourself vibes were coming in hot this week.

Not everything was Botox and rainbows though. My son’s father, for reasons only God knows, did not make the visits he promised him. When he did finally show up on Saturday, it was late and close to bedtime. We go through this every single weekend. It’s an emotional roller coaster without end and leaves me feeling nauseous with anxiety.

As mothers, our children’s pain is our pain. For those of us that are empaths, and in tune with the energies and emotions around us, it is the equivalent of a gut punch to your third eye. Is that a thing? It is now. This occurs weekend, after weekend, after weekend, after weekend…

It is a lot to endure, but my son adores his father, no matter how many times he lets him down. All I can do is try to help him understand the enormous feelings going through his little mind. Although my ex is in the clutches of his disease, our son is still the center of his world. Is his decision-making less than stellar? Hell to the YES. But he loves his son, and they both need each other. It is a painful and peculiar place to be in. I’m supposed to fix everything, kiss the scrapes and bruises to make them all better, but I cannot fix someone’s addiction.

What I can do is be as open and transparent as possible, for his age, and make sure he knows his mother is never going anywhere. I will always be your constant my little man. Come hell or high water, mama has your back. Por vida mi corazón.

For all the people who play the role of “Mother” in someone’s life, this one’s for you.

Feliz Día de Las Madres and Happy Mother’s Day.

XOXO